Day 16

Monday, September 16, 2024

Storyville

I don’t think of myself as an astrology girlie, but I do think that the moon has an effect on us. After all, our bodies are 60% water and the moon causes the tides. The  moon’s cycle is 28 days and so are women’s menstrual cycles. It doesn’t seem like a coincidence.

I also love the idea that we are made of the universe, literal stardust. It makes me think of when my dad and I spread my moms ashes in Florida. Since I was 2 years old, we always vacationed in Fort Myers so when my mom died, my dad and I took her ashes on our next trip and spread them on the beach. At the time, I was pretty uncomfortable. Just the thought that we were holding all that was left of her body really creeped me out. It didn’t seem possible. How could her entire being be reduced to a tube of dust?

We said some words and my dad opened the tube and let the ashes fall to the sand. I walked away thinking how strange it all was and how pointless it felt. Later that same summer, a hurricane came through Florida and the eye was precisely over Fort Myers. All I could think about were my mom’s ashes swirling among the sand and debris. Maybe some of it was swept up into the storm and blown miles away. Maybe some of it was swallowed by the gulf and floated into the sea. Whatever happened to those small bits of her, I know that she's around. She's part of the sky, part of the sea, part of living creatures who will also die and pass on their bodies. She is dust, just the way she started, just the way we all started, stardust. It’s an oddly comforting feeling.